Tuesday, November 17, 2009

The Kind Of Tired That Makes You Want To Cry....

Or yak. I cannot decide which today. Maybe it will be both.

Since we arrived home from the East Coast three weeks ago, we have not been sleeping. None of us. And actually during our vacation we slept poorly there as well, but at least the grandparents gave us a bit of a break. Hunter and Cavan are waking up numerous times throughout the night. Prior to our trip both were sleeping so well that maybe we just got a little spoiled!

Something is definitely going on with Hunter. He goes to sleep every night just before 8pm. We hear him get out of his bed during the night and he runs to the living room (this happens anywhere between 3 and 5 times a night)! Then when you pick him up, he is usually screaming and asking us to play toys or to watch his dump truck movie (this of course wakes up the baby). Most often we can get him back to sleep in just a few minutes, but sometimes we have to throw him in bed with us to calm him down. I am guessing this is nightmares, but maybe some growing pains as well, or he is just addicted to his dump truck movie? He then gets up for the day anywhere between 4 and 5:30am. There is no getting him back to sleep at that point. He is still napping, but it is just for an hour and a half in the afternoons. I have found him to be more grumpy and acting out more (which could also just be toddler behaviours). We try to get him outside to play and he is down at the rec centre twice a week to burn off energy.

For Hunter we have gotten suggestions of just leave him in his room (well he just screams until he yaks, and of course it is hard to keep a baby asleep when the toddler is crying), and don't let him nap (hard because if we try to keep him up for the day you will look over and there he is curled up on his blanket asleep anyways). Do you have any ideas??

Cavan is also waking up numerous times throughout the night. He is also asleep by 8pm, but is up again a few hours later. After that he wakes up usually once an hour to feed. The worst part is trying to get him back down into his crib. He can be right asleep and then as soon as his head hits the mattress he is wide awake and yelling at you. This of course wakes up Hunter. He is also awake for the day around 5am. He naps for one hour in the morning and one hour in the afternoon (of course he rarely will nap the same time as his brother), and a half hour cat nap around 6pm.

Suggestions so far have been to switch him to formula (trying, mainly because he is now biting, but he won't drink from the bottle) and to just let him cry in his crib (counterproductive because it wakes up Hunter, plus we are not fans of just letting the kids cry themselves out especially when they are this young). Any other ideas?

So Matt and I are exhausted. Seriously, you should see Matt, he looks horrible. I bet he is wishing right now that he could just crawl onto one of the patient beds and take a nap. And me... well I am ready to cry at a moments notice. I am miserable from this lack of sleep. I know, I know... you have 9 kids and you are doing just fine and you are supermom.... good for you. I am not and I have no clue how to get through this. So please send positive ideas or a relief crew. I will gladly accept both!

11 comments:

Holly said...

Welcome to parenthood my dear. Believe it or not this will pass. I remember thinking duct tape is the answer to all prayers. Unfortunately there probably isn't a whole lot right now you can do to force them to sleep. Sounds like they have your number and know what they have to do to get up and stay up. Have you tried all the calming tricks of the hot bath and relaxing time before bed? I don't know if kids that young can have chamomile tea? Maybe Matt can find out? Wake Hunter up each time you catch him napping - it will make your life miserable probably, but that might make him sleep better at night. What about white noise? I have an air filter going 24/7 in my bedroom - I don't really hear anything else. It's all habits that need to be broken. Good luck!
Auntie H

Sarah N said...

Aw hugs. That sucks. No fun!
My ideas:
1- With Cavan, try going in, rocking him (you or Matt, if he associates you with boob) and then putting him down. Do you think he's old enough to figure out (over a night or 2) that he can't wake and expect food? Maybe? It's a tough few nights but we found Abby got the idea.
2- Hunter. What about a white noise machine or one of those aquarium things? Give him some sound to ease him back to sleep? If it was something you only turned on for sleep, and used it each time you brought him back to bed, maybe that would "cue" him? I dunno, toddlers arent my game yet.
Good luck though!

soph said...

http://cantonbecker.com/music/white-noise-sleep-sounds/

download some white noise mp3s to see if it works!

soph

Lindsay Niedzielski said...

We went through some trying times with both Paige and Hanna and continue to...we can go months with them both sleeping through the night, and then a week or two with them both waking up. We have a humidifier going in both of the kids' rooms, which works out great it one is crying, because the other one doesn't really hear it. We did end up having to let Hanna cry - it was horrible, but really the only thing that worked for her (and we had really tried everything!!!) And I don't know about dropping th nap - on days that Paige doesn't nap, those are the nights that she sleeps the worst. I still find that both of them are the best when they have a good nap. Anyways, sorry to not really have any advice, but know that you aren't along...sometimes parenting is extremely frustrating, but you are doing your best - that's all anyone can ask!

Tigger said...

This too shall pass! We have had regular ol fans going in both kids' rooms since they were tiny. The white noise helps cover the sounds of the house....As for getting up, Peekaboo is old enough that we put a digital clock in her room (covered up the minutes) and told her she can come out of her room when it is 7. If she wakes up earlier, she reads or plays quietly. Ezra STILL doesn't always sleep through the night....but I trust that some day HE WILL!!!! Right now he has a cold and is awake every 1-1 1/2 hours.....yahoo!

Tina said...

Well, here's my 2 cents. We had the same problem with Joey, and are having a bit of a relapse with it again. When Joey was Hunter's age, honestly it was more of a tough love that worked with him. It only took a night or two, but everytime he got up we put him back to bed. It was straight from Supernanny. He got up the first time and it was "alright buddy, time to go back to bed", tucked in, kisses etc. The 2nd time he got up there were no words, just picked him up and back to bed. I think one night we did it for almost an hour straight before he realized we meant business. Of course, by the end I'm bawling, feeling like a horrible mom as he's in there crying for a drink, a hug, a kiss, etc, anything to get us back in the room. It was hard, but it only took a few times. When Colby was getting up super early, we did the same thing as Tigger. We put a digital clock and he wasn't allowed to get up until the first number was 7. If all else fails, you could just sleep in your camper. :)

Anonymous said...

And here is my two cents as a Mom of 3 (2 sons and a daughter) - and one son who only needed a couple hours sleep at at time - or so we thought at the time.

Turned out he was hungry - and that's what woke him up. We found that if we gave him something to eat before bed (usually oatmeal), he would sleep for hours. But the rule was, he couldn't come out of his room until I came to get him in the morning. Tough battle at first but he got it eventually.

If he is sleeping in the afternoon, notice how long that is after he eats - there may be some clues there for you.

Good luck - and I promise you that you will all survive this!!! Honest.

jen said...

OMG what have I gotten myself into Kara!!! 5am! No freaking way!! I'm totally going to use the white noise trick when number two arrives, it sounds like it might be a good idea to block out the other kid screaming. The only suggestion I have is that there are these bottles that are for breastfed babies to switch over to bottle. Playtex makes them, it might help. Let me know if I can send you some? Good Luck!

Morena said...

I have no idea what to tell you... I just wanted to post some support and sympathy. Good luck.

Fawn said...

Well, I'm no expert considering Halia is still waking up SEVERAL TIMES a night (I suspect allergies, to be honest). But I agree that NOT napping in the afternoon may be counterproductive. Just make sure he doesn't nap too late.

Frances said...

Oh Kara! I feel for you, and everyone else that has had this problem. It's horrible. For Ian at Hunter's age we used a baby gate in is door way so he couldn't get out of the room. He could see out, but couldn't go anywere. Lots of times he would call out, but go back to sleep soon after once he realized there was nothing going on. Honestly, Hunter sounds over tired, due to lack of sleep for so long - it's a hard cycle to get out of. It will pass.
Jacob still gets up a few time a night at 2 1/2. So sucks! We go in give him a hug (no words) and he goes right back to sleep. Most nights :) Always wanted to try the white noise...good luck. Thinking of you and Matt.
Frances